Stories that HAVE to be True...

The title says it all...cause I can't make these up...
SHORT STORIES BY THE MEYERS

SUNNY SATURDAY
One sunny Saturday morning a family woke up together; they greeted each other and consequently all three of them were in the same bed.  The awoke to stretch and get a cup of coffee.  Then the youngest one said a single word.  "Poop" and then another "Potty."  The family was confused, yet acted swiftly to avoid this being a farce..if a lesson is to be learned then why not now.  The opened the bathroom door and the youngest sat on the potty...in her pajamas..picked up "Pajama Time" and began reading.  45 minutes, of sitting, drinking coffee and discussing the latest in pajama fashions...we were poop less on the potty..or in the diaper for that matter.  Upon further conclusion the youngest just wanted some "private time" as we found out when she shut the door in our faces and told us to "go in dere" pointing to the family's kitchen.......

LONG LASTING LAUNDRY
On a cold winter morning, Tuesday, Wednesday & Thursday the youngest awoke, wanted milk and then bolted for the closet to drag out the laundry basket.  It was laundry day of course.  After pulling the full basket to the family's newly purchased front loading machines she began to open the door, hold up each piece of clothing..each and every one... and proclaim...
"Dissa Mama's"
"Dissa Dirty"
" Dissa Go In Dere"
To which she loaded the machine....the family's parental unit on duty that morning figured to let her go as the pile in the basket seemed to be getting smaller.  "Time for another cup of coffee..'"  Upon returning the parent was surprised to find the washing machine empty with a pile of clothes on the floor...and the youngest upon seeing the audience had returned began....
"Dissa Papa's"
"Dissa Dirty"
"Dissa Go in Dere"
And so we went for the second loading of the first load...this time with supervision to get it done.  With a satisfying push the door was closed and the words "Pusha button" were uttered, to which the parental unit kindly obliged.
It was breakfast time...and soon after the youngest was playing, got sidetracked and ran into said laundry room; before the parental unit could comprehend the words "Pusha Button" were uttered and it was done, but not the start button, the power button...after the rinse..before the spin.....so Whirlpool, when you include instructions saying a load should take 25 minutes..you need to include a clause that reads "elapsed washing time will double, triple or quadruple with a 22 month in the vicinity of the power button or self loading."  Ours quadrupled...and so the second load of wash firmly bumped the parental units out of the "energy saving" appliance usage category..at least for that run.....

There is still time to perfect...or well...close the laundry room door.....